Healthy Reflections

Psalm 31:9-10, 14Be gracious to me, O LORD, for I am in distress; my eye wastes away from grief,

my soul and body also. For my life is spent with sorrow, and my years with sighing; my strength

Grieving the losses related to the coronavirus pandemic is something that we have all experienced, even if we are not consciously aware of many of those losses. Some losses are clear and significant – lives, health, jobs or income – these are clearly understood & acknowledged. But many others are less obvious and impact emotional health; think missed proms, postponed events and vacations; plus the loss of the freedoms of everyday living – shopping, visiting friends, going to the gym, movies or library – all of these have changed. These are legitimate losses that must be grieved. Acknowledging grief is important. Too often we try to put a positive twist “things will be better soon”, rather than naming the emotion “this is a sad time with missed moments/losses.”

Ambiguous loss is a loss that occurs without closure or clear understanding. Learn to acknowledge the uncertainty-the lost sense of normalcy, then seek to discover new sources of hope. Focus on the present with the concept of “both/and”. This means that we can feel loss in the present and also feel safe in the moment.

How we deal with these losses is different for each person ~ There is no one-size-fits-all; you do you! But knowing these losses may be around for a while, here are some tips to embrace our new reality:


  • If you are working from home, and/or your kids are now home from school, use this time to connect as a family. Our kids are watching our attitudes.
  • Acknowledge that this is a temporary inconvenience in life. These frustrations won’t last forever. Like an inoculation – painful to get, but a really good idea to protect my health and safety.
  • Have a grateful heart.
  • Do your best to remain positive. Replace negative thoughts like, “I’m stuck at home” or “Everything is shutting down, I’m panicking”, with positive thoughts like, “I get to be SAFE in my home and spend time with family” or “The most IMPORTANT places, such as medical centers, pharmacies and grocery stores, remain open”.
  • And above all, keep a sense of humor. It helps.
  • We have hope, for our God is an excellent source of comfort and care.


“Whenever my busy thoughts were out of control, the soothing comfort of your presence calmed me down and overwhelmed me with delight.”  Psalm 94:19

What a comfort these words are!

Jill Koubal, Parish Nurse


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